I went to Dubai few days ago, and experienced an A-380 flight simulation at Dubai Mall. Since I am quite familiar with the airplane things, the conversation with the captain was very funny.
Just for remembrance.
1.
Me: “Do we have ATC control?”
Captain: “Well, we should have, but you know, it won’t work.”
Me: “…”
2.
(Cruising extremely fast towards the airport at 6,000fts, something like 400kts)
Me: “We cannot exceed 250kts…”
Captain: “Below 10,000fts, yes, but we are saving time, you know…”
Me: “…”
Captain: “You want to skip this part?”
Me: “All right…”
3.
Me: “Why can’t I see the PAPI light?”
Captain: “It’s over there, four whites, we are way too high.”
Me: “Sorry, I still can’t see it, I am shortsighted. ⊙﹏⊙”
Captain: “Never mind, just descend some attitude. (/ □ )”
4.
Me: “Is this red button for releasing auto pilot?”
Captain: “Yes.”
Me: “When should I release it? 500fts?”
Captain: “We are not using auto pilot now, it’s me.”
Me: “∑(ﾟДﾟノ)ノ ”
5.
Me: “Why don’t we use ILS?”
Captain: “We are using it, you see the localizer there?”
Me: “Oh, I see it.”
(Few seconds later…)
Me: “Actually, I mean the auto landing system.”
Captain: “It doesn’t work here.”
Me: “…”
6.
Me: “OMG, I don’t think I can make it.”
Captain: “…”
Me: “OMG, why the rudder doesn’t work?”
Captain: “…” (Stamping on the rudder pretty hard to the opposite direction.)
Me: “OMG, should I go around now?” (Almost missed the runway.)
Captain: “Just cut off throttle, nose down.”
(The plane bumped twice on the runway.)
Me: “It’s not fun at all… (｀⌒´メ) ”
7.
Captain: “You want to try visual landing or instrument for this time?”
Me: (Is there any difference?) “Visual’s fine…”
(Still can’t recognize PAPI…)